Jevean
I'm really sorry about your panic attacks. I've had them off and on for about ten years. The first thing I'd ask is: Are you in therapy? There must be an underlying reason for these panic attacks. Therapy would probably help you get to the core issue and also help you recognize when you are going to be in a situation that might cause an attack. Have you tried relaxation therapy? Or visualization therapy? Deep breathing helps very much. In my situation, sometimes being able to get to a place where I am alone, where there is fresh air, and where it is quiet helps. It is important to take deep breaths. Usually in a panic attack, we begin to breathe very quickly and very shallow. This speeds up the heart rate and usually increases the panicky feeling. If you are able to also do some visualization of a scene or place or activity that you find peaceful, that may help as well. Some people have found that certain odors enable them to relax. For me, eucalyptus does very well. You may be able to find an aromatherapy stick in a health food store. Mine is about the size of a tube of chapstick. I unscrew it and inhale the scent and find it calming. Ever heard of a worry stone? It's something that is sort of a grounding technique since it is tactile. Sometimes when in the midst of a panic attack, you may feel not quite grounded or as if you are in the original situation that gave you the panic attack. If you are able to look around and touch something in "the now," it may help. This only works for some people, because not everyone dissociates when they are having a panic attack. I know you said that you have been intolerant to most anti-anxiety medications. Perhaps there might be a drug out there for you. You may want to try consulting with a psychiatrist. Alternatively, some people go the herbal route. In this vein, I've heard that valerian root may help, though I've never tried it myself. I hope this helps. Feel free to write if you have any questions or comments. Take care. --Jevean