susan
I've tried several times to post a message to you. I have a son who had the same problem when he was about the same age. I took him to numerous doctors the response I got was simular to yours. They told me he was just to lazy to go. He was later diagnosed with ADD and I found out then that this problem is sometimes associated with ADD. Its called fecal Incontinance. When the school threatened to expell him from school for the problem I tried one more desperate attempt to find a doctor to help. I finally reached a gastro-intestional specialist. He knew exactly what I was talking about. My son had a blocked intestons. The problem may have originated from him being constipated and not dealing with it. The resulting problem was that all he was able to get out was seepage which he had no control over. This was the bowel movement in the pants. The problem was resolved with medical treatment. No surgery was needed but we had to go through a regiment of, I just can't remeber what type of oil it was. Anyway point is there maybe a medical reason. It was as simple as taking xrays. If you need to e-mail me I know how difficult it is for both of you. I would have given anything to have found the answer earlier. I listed to the original doctors, I did punish and I regret very much how I handled it at the time. Please don't give up keep trying doctors till someone can help. The self estime they lose at this time is very difficult to recover. If he is like my son he can not help it. He has no control and does not know any more than you do as to why it is happening. I hope this gets to you good luck