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sleep apnea - romance & the CPAP

rita

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Can anyone offer me some help? I'm in the beginning of a serious relationship with a man who has obstructive sleep apnea & uses a CPAP machine. He's supposed to have surgery, but that isn't definite yet and won't be for several months at the earliest. I've listened to him at night and know his condition is pretty severe..he apiates quite frequently & it's very scary. He refuses to sleep with the CPAP on when I am around..."it's not conducive to cuddling" he says..but then he sleeps poorly all night & has the feeling of a hangover all day the next day. He feels terrible, and I feel guilty. Also, I cannot stay with him more than 1 night, as he cannot have 2 nights without 'good' sleep with the CPAP...or he's exhausted. How do couples overcome this CPAP? Any suggestions for me on how to proceed? There are so many great things about this relationship that I don't want this issue to come between us. I want to find a solution for it before it becomes an 'issue'. Any advice would be greatly appreciated! Thank you!
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